It’s been a fantastic summer, I’m trying not to wish it away, but now that I’ve shipped both my sons off to school, it’s definitely feeling like fall. I catch myself wandering around my empty house, it’s taking some adjustment and yes, a few tears as predicted. With an unseasonably hot summer, I’m relieved to have slightly cooler temperatures and the rain (it’s a novelty at the moment). I’m trying to come to terms with how quickly the season has gone, that said, I could have used a vacation somewhere, anywhere, poor planning on my part and then, there’s the dog to consider. I was torn, wanting to be around for my younger son, trying to get as much face time with him before he headed off to school. My older son was visiting two weeks, it was becoming a challenge to plan something around everyone’s schedules.
With only a few more days left of summer, I am anxiously waiting for one season to end and another to start. New beginnings?
A new season, call me crazy, I can’t help feeling this is the calm before the storm but in a good way. Life is throwing me a lot of options and challenges, and for the first time, I’m ok with it, bring it on! It doesn’t come without consequences, I’m putting myself out there, being vulnerable (new for me) and letting go of situations that I would generally be in control of. Not knowing how things will turn out is truly a lesson in letting go, not to mention a few tears, WTF, what is happening to me? Constantly reminding myself, “You got this!”
Autumn is one of my favourite seasons, crunchy leaves, oversized sweaters, red wine, cooler temperatures, candlelight, comfort food, crackling fires, drinks out, dinners in, need I say more? I’m a disaster, a hopeless romantic, not that there’s anything wrong with that, or is there? I’m totally setting myself up for failure unless I meet said similar guy, right? Does he exist? He’s in my head, and I can’t get rid of him, what to do, what to do?
In the meantime, Paris, Florence and Milan are calling me, and I can’t wait! I need a change of scenery in the worst way. One more kick at the can, alone, in the city of love…why do I do this to myself? No worries, this is my new season, of letting go, whatever will be will be and maybe, just maybe I’ll find L’Amour or Amore, where I least expect it!