September 9, 2018


FINALLY! The universe is listening to me, likely exhausted from hearing my cries and all of my F-bombs.

I won’t give you the specifics, but let’s say synchronicity was at work several weeks ago. I’ve said nothing, afraid that I may jinx it for myself. But, hopefully, I wasn’t calling his bluff, and the emotions were real. It felt right, an attraction, chemistry, and a connection, which for me, doesn’t come along often.

I know I’m overthinking again. It’s hard not to when someone ignites a fire in you. Did I imagine all of this in my head? The last thing I need is complicated, and timing is everything. I need to be with someone who’s into me, as I am with them but have the freedom to move forward. What are the rules, fearful that I’m stepping on eggshells? Am I doing this wrong? If it’s meant to be, it will happen. As for the universe, you’re getting warm.

Dreaming of this and more

At this stage of my life, I expect to meet men with some amount of baggage, hopefully just carry-on size. I use the term lightly. We all come with some version of baggage. Naturally, I’m referring to ex-wives, husbands, unresolved issues, damaged goods syndrome (apparently it’s a thing), trust and children, just a few to mention. I know I fall under a few categories, and we’re all trying to figure this out.  

Here’s the thing, you can’t expect to meet someone and assume you’re at the same stage of life. I’m pretty confident you would need to date a lot of people to finally meet that fantastic person who happens to be an empty nester like yourself. Either you go along with whatever their life serves up, or you will be left behind. But if you can’t deal with what they’re serving, time to get out now.  

What if that guy you’ve been waiting for is there for the taking, despite their baggage? It’s a hard one. Convincing them you’re ready and willing may make you sound desperate, god forbid! But what’s wrong with taking a chance? So, yes, said guy had me at hello, but in the end, it’s all about timing. Unfortunately, I’ll never know what could have been, nor will he.

It’s not a death, but sometimes it feels like it. Ending a relationship, marriage, or bond with that person who was once your best friend is the hardest ever imaginable. You can be strong and invincible, but if you are honest with yourself, it hurts like hell!

And so, I wonder about a future with someone. How do we get past all of our shit? I need to look after myself and my feelings going forward, taking baby steps for something great down the road or for synchronicity to catch up.

Is it time for me to take that exit for an entry somewhere else?



The comments +

  1. Dang it, so much to say to you but it would a glass (maybe several) of wine conversation.

    Two quickies:
    1. In order to get over the death of my marriage, I needed to ask myself questions about why it failed. That included being honest about what I contributed to that failure, then dealing with it. I likely didn’t give myself the time needed to do that, before I got involved in a new relationship.
    2. When you do meet someone new, leave your baggage at home. I am very tired of hearing the woman I am dating talk about her ex, because she does that each and every time I see her. I care but the baggage gets in the way.

    Best wishes to you, my friend.

    • Lots of conversations to have with wine, right? I agree…I’m in a great place with my ex but it took a while to get there. I guess I was generally speaking, at this stage and age of our lives, it’s hard not to escape some sort of baggage (as long as its just carry on;)) and so we either roll with it or get out, right? But for the right guy, it would be worth it…thanks, friend 🙂

      • I shouldn’t read at work, because I chuckled a little too loud when I read “carry on”. Such a spot on way to say it! Some are more skilled baggage handlers at my age (I decided not to include you in my age category, young lady).

        Speaking of baggage, I am travelling to Budapest next week, with a layover in Istanbul on the return that will allow me to see my daughter. I want to pack light, but it’s my first trip to company headquarters in four years, plus I am recording several videos to be used on the company YouTube channel. I have to dress nice.

      • Have a great trip! Budapest is on my list of places to visit. As for the subtle fashion query, try not to channel Jerry Seinfeld;) wear outside your comfort zone, gives you confidence!

  2. Thanks! This is my second trip to Budapest. Some day, I hope it’s not just a business trip 😉

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