Shaking things up

I’m happy to report this year wasn’t a complete bust when it comes to the world of dating or just getting out for a friendly drink with the opposite sex.  I have always enjoyed being in the company of men, most are easy to talk with and usually offer a different point of view from my own. Interestingly enough, I’m no closer to a relationship than saying hello to the guy in the grocery lineup.  All in all, it has been an eye-opening, somewhat confusing but overall good experience. I met a cocktail shaker of personalities…a refreshing complex Rosé, a chill Beer connoisseur, a Manhatten that left me wanting anything but, a 25-year-old Scotch who paraded as it’s younger 12-year-old and a Vodka drinker who left me with an unexplainable hangover but in a good way.  All great drinks but two definitely caught me off guard…

alcohol bar black background close up
Photo by Prem Pal Singh on

Seriously though, I’m putting myself out there and I would like to think I am easy going.  I am a “straight-up” less is more kind of girl, I am turnkey, independent and without drama. All I ask for in return is for someone likewise, who is respectful, charming and fun, with the possibility of something more serious down the road. One more want…be at least 5′ 10″ cuz I’m that in heels, is this unrealistic, too much to ask? For the right man, I am willing to go the extra mile.  I am not selling out, maybe I’m too practical or I’m the simpler creature?  The crazy thing is I am NOT alone in this…I hear this over and over again from single women like myself.  When it comes to matters of the heart, everyone has a different experience.   I’m not desperate but at this rate, it’s clearly about the journey, not the destination.

Especially hard is dating after being with the same person for 31 years.  Holy shit! It’s horrifying to say it out loud, I can’t imagine what any man would think about my situation. I must be a HUGE red flag. Which is funny because I was thinking the exact same thing about the Scotch drinker who never married…are we the same risk factor?

I struggled with the holidays, it would have been more enjoyable celebrating with that someone special.  It’s hard not to go to that place, forgetting everything I have written and said in the past. My glass which is always full is feeling very empty. I needed to say that, I’m not gonna lie, it’s hard to be upbeat all the time, it can be exhausting.  I’m really looking forward to closing the book on 2018 and getting on with my life.  I know I keep saying this but I am seriously taking this on!  I have wasted way too much time on men who can’t see a good thing when it’s sitting in front of them, giving them a slight eye roll.

My mind has been working overtime and that roommate needs to get the “F” out of my head.  I’m done over thinking texts and what my next move should be and what I’m supposed to say, only to be disappointed, again and again.  I am taking me back and not listening to anyone but me, besides, I’ve done me a lot longer than anyone else.

 “a man is not a plan but it would be fun to make plans with a man,” said me

Here’s to 2019 and Shaking things Up!



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